LDR

I've been filled with jealously recently.

To a point where I can't bare to even look at the news feed in my Facebook. I'd see lovey dovey pictures of my friends with their girlfriend or boyfriend, and think to myself, how I wish I was them.

I was wrong, I can't compare myself to them, I'm in an LDR, and they practically see each other 24/7.

What could I do? Ask everyone to stop PDA (Public Display of Affection) in front of me?? And the thing is, I've already been through the lovey-dovey phase. What more can I ask for?

I've even avoid looking at the things, presents, and stuff, I've been given ... coz I'm afraid it might affect my mood, but for some reason, I had to dig deep into all these stuff today. I read through all those hand-made cards, hand-made photo album, written letters, and postcards.

I realize that back then, I took the role of the person who receive rather than giving because I'm not ... how do I put it nicely? Let's just say I'm not so in love at that moment in time and I'm not so needy compared to the person I am today.

I don't know if LDR will make us grow apart or not. Only time can answer this question. I know you still love me, but maybe the way you love me have changed over time. I don't know if I changed, or maybe I've been standing on the same spot the whole time, holding on to it, and hoping that nothing will change.

It's silly.

Imagine yourself, sitting on a spot, and stop whatever you're doing, and just be still (its my silly attempt to stop the things and people around me from changing). You think the people, things, or place around you wouldn't change? No .. they'd continue to evolve and move along with their life.

B, its not your fault alright, I know you still love me ^@^

I guess I'm just like a kid that wish I wouldn't grow up, and stay a child forever.

P/S: I've practically stick every picture I can find of us on the board ^@^ I need to put you back into my life :) I love you!